Arrested Development Season 2

[amazon-product]B000A9QKRI[/amazon-product] It’s hard for me to say which seasons of Arrested Development are my favorite, as there were only 3 of them (see also some thoughts on Season 3). However, I do have a soft spot for Season 2, as it is probably the season that got me into the show in the first place. Season 2 had established even more of the recurring jokes, such as the family chicken dances. It had some great guest stars-Ben Stiller, Dan Castellaneta, and the returning Julia Louis Dreyfus- to mix with the cast and the recurring guest stars such as Henry Winkler and Judy Greer. It’s one wacky show that was only too short.

Like my previous post on Season 3, I’ll be picking one great quote from each episode (thanks to the OP fansite for the quotes)

Michael: You haven’t auditioned yet?
Tobias: Oh, no, no. I’m not in the group yet. No, I’m afraid I just blue myself.
Michael: There’s got to be a better way to say that.

Buster: …hole in my heart. I’ve never opened my eyes underwater. My, um… (Whispering.) genital area… (Normal voice.) is shaped like a… (Whispering.) lobster tail, … (Normal voice.) but without its shell. Uh, oh, I guess I have the panic attacks under control. Oh, and I’m legally blind at night.
Narrator: But Buster had miscalculated the Army’s current need for personnel.
Army Doctor: Okay, then, let’s get you fitted for a uniform.

George Michael: Way to plant, Ann.
Michael: George Michael, why don’t you and Plant just wait in the staircar?

G.O.B.: So, did you see the new Poof [ed. note: A magic magazine]?
Michael: His name’s Gary. And we don’t need any more lawsuits, okay?

Michael: Are you serious?
Wayne Jarvis: Almost always. I was once called the worst audience participant Cirque du Soleil ever had.

Michael: My mom is very stressed out, and, uh, she needs something that I can’t give her. Um… maybe a little “Afternoon Delight”?
Narrator: Oscar thought that Michael was referring to a particular brand of cannabis named “Afternoon Deelite,” a strain famous for slowing behavior.
Oscar: Well, sure. The question is, which way do I try to get it in her?
Michael: I don’t need any details.
Oscar: Maybe I’ll put it in her brownie.

Stan Sitwell: The only thing I ask is, out of the 450 homes we build, one be given to a disadvantaged family from the inner city.
G.O.B.: That’s great. So the other 449 families live in fear? Is that what we’re saying? I mean, come on! Where’s your decenc…?

G.O.B.: So, get this. I took his dress eyebrows.
Narrator: Sitwell suffered from a disease that rendered him completely hairless.
Michael: He’s not gonna be happy about that.
G.O.B.: No. Especially when he goes to the opera with two mustaches on his forehead.

George, Sr.: My back is… it’s-it’s in knots. I haven’t had a massage since prison.
Michael: Hope that was forced.

Tobias: Well, yes, but I’m afraid I prematurely shot my wad on what was supposed to be a dry run, if you will, so now I’m afraid I have something of a mess on my hands.
Michael: There are just so many poorly chosen words in that sentence.

Tobias: You know, Mother Lucille, there’s a psychological concept known as denial that I believe you’re evincing. It’s when a thought is so hateful that the mind literally rejects it.
Lucille: You are a worse psychiatrist than you are a son-in-law, and you will never get work as an actor because you have no talent.
Tobias: Well, if she’s not going to say anything, I certainly can’t help her.

Car Salesman: The Bronco’s been discontinued. We’re trying to shed that whole fugitive on the run thing. This is the Escape.
George, Sr.: What a fun name. May I test drive?

Maeby: Do you guys know where I could get one of those gold necklaces with the ‘T’ on it?
Michael: That’s a cross.
Maeby: Across from where?

Lindsay: Can’t you at least come over and Dustbuster or something?
Lupe: I no does Buster anymore.
Lindsay: Fine. I’ll Dustbuster.

Tony Wonder: But, yeah, meet me out there tomorrow. And if you get thirsty… (Screams in pain.) Ah! (Groans.) (Groaning continues.) (Grunts.) Have a free round of drinks courtesy of Tony Wonder.
Buster: It’s a Subway Sub Club card.
G.O.B.: That’s a magician.
Buster: Oh, it still needs three stamps.

G.O.B.: Franklin said some things Whitey wasn’t ready to hear.
Michael: G.O.B., weren’t you also mercilessly beaten outside of a club in Torrance for that act?
G.O.B.: He also said some things that African-American-y wasn’t ready to hear either.

Maeby: Why are we even going after this idiot demographic?

Maeby: George Michael? Are you protesting this?
George Michael: This isn’t the line?
Ann: Yes, he is protesting it. He even helped me make the signs.
George Michael: Well, only mine and the one that says, “This is a tricky gray area.”